Newt Gingrich
Rush Limbaugh
The salesman laughed and said, "There are no controls. The radio operates by voice recognition. Watch this : I think we'll listen to classical."
Suddenly, the sound of a Mozart symphony filled the car.
Then the salesman said, "Blues" and they were listening to B.B. King.
The man who had bought the car was very impressed and drove off the lot in a great mood. He was amazed by his radio and kept changing the stations.
"Jazz," the man said, and he was instantly listening to Charlie Parker.
"Disco" he said, and that produced K.C. and the Sunshine Band.
The man kept this up for some time, tuning in to every kind of music imaginable just by asking for it. In fact, he was so enthralled that he wasn't really paying attention to the road. Suddenly, another driver cut him off.
Without thinking, the man yelled, "Big, Fat Idiot!" and the next thing he knew, he was listening to Rush Limbaugh.
The Doles
Pat Buchanan
At The 1996 Oscars
More GOP Creeps
Elaine May : Do you subscribe to the current belief that there is no paranoia?
Mike Nichols : Far from it. I happen to know for a fact that this is a lie instituted by the international banking conspiracy and the FBI.
E.M. : How would you go about achieving world peace if you had the time?
M.N. : I would institute a huge tax break for interracial marriages as well as marriages among warring factions. Eventually we would have one very good-looking group of people who get along fine. I admit this would take time but I am patient.
E.M. : What is the biggest secret you were ever told and asked not to repeat?
M.N. : The identity of Anonymous. You know, the one who wrote "Greensleeves."